Tagged as 'ex back'

Get your LIFE Back 4: Third time’s the charm.

The two stories I’ve told you so far may have given you the wrong impression, but I should say I’m not opposed to the concept of re-kindling a relationship and getting back together with your EX. However, I do think people should be careful about getting addicted to someone else, and they should always make sure they love the person they’re dating, rather than the idea of the person.

With that said, I’ll proceed to tell you the happiest story I know about a couple that really does seem to belong together. A couple that’s made of two people that utterly love each other, and who have been separated 3 times already. But each time they have sorted their differences and resumed their relationship. And I’m quite happy it turned out that way, because Anthony and Rose are the happiest couple I know.

They are now in their forties, Anthony and Rose. I’ve known them since I was a teenager, since they’re both childhood friends of my closest cousin. They have now been dating for maybe 15 years, and they have been separated three times. I clearly remember the first time it happened, it was back in 1998 when I had just got my drivers license. I remember I was ecstatic about that, and I rushed to the café where I used to hang about with my cousin and some of his friends.

Anthony and Rose were usually the disgustingly happy couple that always sat in the middle of the group, but that day something was off. Continue reading “Get your LIFE Back 4: Third time’s the charm.” »

Get your LIFE back 3: When Stupidity Do Us Part.

The previous post in this series demonstrated how some couples would be better of separated, as opposed to growing addicted to their mutually inflicted misery. This post will tell a story that’s just the opposite: of a guy who grew addicted to his loneliness, and a girl who could never quite get over their separation.

Dave and Deni are  both in their mid-thirties, now. It was about 10 years ago, when they lived what I believe was the happiest time of their lives. That’s the time when they were together, and even though they refuse to admit it, I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen either of them happier, ever since.

I never knew exactly what brought about their breaking up. No one ever did, and sometimes I wonder if even they have a clear notion of the specific reasons that pushed them apart. I just know they were the perfect couple, back then. Or at least as perfect as any couple could get.

They were both the creative types. Dave was studying fine arts, Deni had dropped out of college and she was doing alright as a writer. They met each other in the summer of 1999, and they got married in the first day of the next year. Continue reading “Get your LIFE back 3: When Stupidity Do Us Part.” »

Get your LIFE back 1: Not the same as “Get your EX Back”.

When a relationship ends, more often than not there’s a person who abandons the relationship – and another person who wishes the relationship wouldn’t have ended. It has been so from the dawn of humanity, and quite likely it will be so for as long as the human race endures. Breaking up is just a natural part of being in a relationship, in the same way that dying is a natural part of living.

If you’ve ever found yourself in a position where you suffered to see your boyfriend or girlfriend get out of your life, you surely have a good idea of what I’m talking about. If you are in such a position right now, maybe you’re reading this article looking for help. That a good thing, and you will get such help – but it may be in the form you expect. You see, in my opinion there are only two ways to escape your present suffering:

1) Deal with it. Accept you’re better off without that person; even though you may be suffering from romantic withdrawal, you should recognize your relationship wasn’t positive. If so, you need to focus on getting your life back.

2) Deal with it. If you can honestly say that your relationship was healthy and promising for both you and your partner, do something about it – but make sure you know what  you’re doing. Learn how to get your ex back.

3) Deal with it, but please do yourself a big favor and avoid making rash decisions and desperate moves. I’m well aware you’re suffering; but before you act, you need to stop and decide on the right course of action.

Ok, so to summarize our topics…. you really need to deal with it. First and foremost, you need to quit evading your pain; it’s there for a reason, and you can learn something from it. You can become a better person once you let your pain change you for the best. Just be honest with yourself, and don’t let yourself go sour on account of your suffering.

The most important thing you need to do right now is figuring out the most appropriate course of action – that’s before you deal with getting your life back. You should notice I’ve written get your LIFE back, not get your EX back. In some cases it will be the same thing, Continue reading “Get your LIFE back 1: Not the same as “Get your EX Back”.” »

Are you sure you want your EX back?

For most of us who have been left behind by our ex-lovers, this is a common reaction: going over inordinate lengths to figure out a way of restoring that relationship. It oftentimes feels like the right thing to do, but it’s not necessarily so. My experience has taught me that pursuing such goals, we sometimes just lose perspective and truly get out of range on who we really are. We’ll easily sacrifice our sense of self-worth, for the sake of chasing after a lost cause. Nothing good will come from this kind of scenario.

As such, it’s crucial to understand IF getting your ex back is REALLY what you want, before doing any attempt at re-captivating their heart.

If you see yourself getting lost in despair trying to figure out a way to get your ex back, here’s something I want you to consider beforehand: are you sure that’s really what you want? Are you sure you miss that person, or do you just miss being in a relationship? Also, are you at loss because your just life isn’t the same on your own, or did your ego just get offended because you got dumped? These are some of the questions you’d best contemplate before going after your ex; and you should make sure you’re honest figuring out the answers, or you’ll just be fooling yourself!

There’s something that I should set straight before further elaborating on this argument. You see, I don’t mean to propose that trying to get your ex back is always a bad idea. Much the other way around! Restoring a relationship can be very positive and uplifting, and you can become a better, happier, and more fulfilled person in the process. Rekindled relationships can sometimes get stronger than ever, and I think genuine affection is always worth fighting for: even if massive lenghts must be transversed to get it done. HOWEVER, I know that oftentimes people who want their EX back are looking for nothing but an illusion of happiness, as opposed to the real thing.

Let’s face it: Getting over relationship habits can be troublesome. Separating thoughts from emotions is not always easy. In a break-up scenario, our ego tends to get in the way and further mess things up. It goes to say that oftentimes, people who are trying to get their ex back are just trying to prove themselves they really loved that person, and they’re good enough to keep that person happy, and it easily gets to a point where it seems as though their actually happiness depends on whether they can indeed get their ex back. However, I don’t think people really stop to wonder: “Am I better off on my own? Am I chasing after someone who genuinely deserves my commitment, or am I merely throwing a tantrum because I was dumped?“.

If more people were capable of seeing things in perspective, I’m sure the “Get my EX back” kind of products wouldn’t be so popular as they are nowadays. I can even recommend some great e-books for getting started on getting your EX back… but before doing so, I must urge you to take some time and think if that’s really what you want! If you realize you’re indeed chasing after love rather than hollow illusions and affections, I’m sure I’ll be able to help you.

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