After doing thorough research on facebook hacking, I can a tell you that there are only 3 methods to hack facebook password:

Keyloggers (Spy Software)

Keylogging is basically recording the keys pressed on a keyboard and is usually accomplished with spy software which will keep a log of all kinds of activities done on the computer. Every website visited, every key pressed, and periodic screenshots are just some of the typical features. The problem with this is the majority of spy software products out there (and there are a lot of them) will notify the user that they are being monitored. Pretty much the only remote spy software product i’ve been able to find that does not do this is called SniperSpy. They even moved their business to another country to get around the increasing pressure in the US to prevent monitoring computers you don’t own, so that their software was 100% stealthy for the customer. In my previous articles i’ve mentioned sniperspy and how i’ve used it myself to catch my girlfriend not only cheating, but stealing my money when i wouldn’t have known without hacking her myspace – well the same can be done with facebook.

Mobile phone spying (android and iphone)

Mobile spy software! It’s been around for years, but only on some phones that most people didn’t have. Then the iPhone was born and changed everything causing the smartphone to become ‘cool’, and then a wave of android phones followed such as the Droid, Evo, Incredible, etc (theres like 20 phones now). Even I myself have a smartphone capable of running spy software now (HTC Evo from sprint), but just last year I had a motorola razr which could not run such sophisticated software. While monitoring a phone of course has the advantage of spying on text messages and phone calls, were here to talk about facebook and how to hack facebook passwords. Getting the spy software installed on a phone without physically handling it is almost impossible, so if you think you can hack a phone over the internet – not yet, because any program that is installed on the phone must be done manually. There are only two products that work on both iPhone and android phones – they are Mobile Spy and MobiStealth and you can read my detailed review of them both in my other article Top 3 Apps for Spying on Text Messages and Call History.

Phishing (fake facebook login pages)

If you’ve been on facebook long enough, you’ve seen your friends making weird status updates or wall posts that you know they wouldn’t make such as “hey i just won $100 check out this site www.somescam.com”. It happens to your friends and it happened because of Phishing. Phishing is basically the process of tricking someone into entering their private information into a FAKE login page and it’s used on all kinds of things from bank accounts to email accounts to gaming accounts. This is how it usually works: the victim is sent an email that appears to be from facebook (yes, this can be easily done) and the message contains a call to action such as “Your account needs to be activated or it will be suspended!!!” along with a link to activate your account which goes to a fake login page that looks identical to facebook’s. Due to many peoples ignorance to how authentic looking and convincing these “phishing” messages can be, people often click the links and enter their login details without thinking, and now a spammer/hacker has them for his purposes which is usually hacking more accounts – after all, you would trust your friends that send you a link right?”

If you would like to learn how to do this yourself, I am all about education and have created very detailed phishing instructions along with a fake login page creator tool which you can Download Here. (To hide this from authorities, I have placed a ringtones offer that you MUST complete in order to download the instructions. Simply enter your cell number and confirm the code sent to your phone and you will be taken to the downlooad page.)

Conclusion

The huge advantage of computer spy software over other methods is that instead of only getting the facebook password, you can get passwords to all different kinds of sites, chat logs, and most importantly SCREENSHOTS. For example, say they are deleting their inbox messages from facebook (which happens alot with paranoid spouses) – normally you would have no idea or anyway to recover them with just their password, but sniperspy will have recorded what the screen looked like when they were browsing their inbox so that you can look at the picture and read the message.

Phishing, while the most popular method  to hack a facebook, is highly technical and relies heavily on tricking the person. It is mainly used on a mass scale and not for targeting specific people because of it’s low success rate – the success rate depends highly of course on the intelligence of the person and how believable your “phish” is.

Finally, mobile spying is about as effective as computer spying (once installed), but the fact is that not everyone has a cell phone that will run spy software. Thats right, not everyone has a cool iPhone, Droid, or Evo yet. But because these phones are so cool, they make for a great gift that you can preinstall the spy app on and then have full access to whoever you give it to.

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Simply having a phone line on the account will not matter when it comes to ownership – your phone number and call records belong to whoever’s name is on the account and you will need permission from the account holder to even transfer your phone number in the future. By having the account in your name you are insuring that your phone number is 100% yours and that you can access your spouse’s phone records whenever you want. Vice versa, you will also be protecting yourself from your spouse accessing YOUR phone records without your permission.

If your relationship were to ever head to divorce (and we both know divorce statistics are high), proving infidelity can be a huge factor in your favor during divorce court. If you do not have the phone account in your name you will need to file a Motion for Production of Documents with the court and subpoena the phone company for the call logs – not an easy feat. You could also get your spouse to sign a release and hand it to the phone company, but I don’t expect that to happen very often .

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I searched for all spying apps I could find that met 3 important requirements: hidden from both the app list and task managers, able to access the spy data online, and records at least text messages and phone call history.

SMS Box

SMS Box will forward and archive all your phone calls and text messages to a web database where it can be accessed. I tested this app out and it appeared to work as it says. A free version of this app is available, but it does not include the stealth feature. The paid version of this app does not show up in the app list and sells currently for 19.90 euros ($27.13).

Pros

• Free version available
• Easily installable from the app market

Cons

• Limited features
• App must be purchased on additional phones you want to monitor
• No tech support if you have issues

Mobile Spy

The first spy software to come out of the iPhone is Mobile Spy, and it now works on android phones along with a ton of other smartphones. Besides text message and call logging, mobile spy also records photos and videos taken with the phone, appointments, emails, and even logs GPS locations so you can track just exactly where that phone has been traveling to. Information is accessed remotely online and you can check out a demo of the interface on their website. A big advantage to mobile spy is that it also works on the iPhone, windows smartphones, and many other types of phones including blackberrys.

Pros

• Works on many other types of phones
• Alerts to new phone contacts is a cool feature
• GPS, email, photo, and video logging steps up your spying power
• Yearly purchase includes Sniper Spy for free, a computer monitoring software we rave about constantly
• Phone support

Cons

• Product is subscription based
• No refunds unless you have technical difficulties that they are unable to help you with
• Limited to 3 phones you may monitor, per subscription

MobiStealth

MobiStealth recently emerged as a solid competitor to Mobile Spy and shares many of the same features, but it has some more advanced features and comes in 3 different flavors of Lite, Pro, and Pro-X. The lite version is priced the same as Mobile Spy and has the same features except for photo/video logging. The Pro version is where it gets interesting – send a secret invisible text message to tell the phone to start recording the surrounding audio or retrieve the current GPS location, and the Pro-X version will record and upload phone call conversations for later listening.

Pros The most features in a single spy app No limit to the number of phones you can monitor Better online spy interface than SMS Box or Mobile Spy Cons Product is subscription based Lite version has less features than Mobile Spy at the same price

Conclusion

After trying and reviewing all 3 spy apps on my phone I found each one to have it’s advantages. If you just want to spy on text messages and call history quickly and on the cheap, SMS Box via the app market is your best bet only costing $30 bucks. If you need additional spying features such as GPS to know where the phone is traveling and photo/video/email logging to monitor for anything suspicious, Mobile Spy is a better choice. Finally, if you need more advanced features like the ability to record phone conversations and remote text message control over the phone then MobiStealth is the superior choice.

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With that said, I’ll proceed to tell you the happiest story I know about a couple that really does seem to belong together. A couple that’s made of two people that utterly love each other, and who have been separated 3 times already. But each time they have sorted their differences and resumed their relationship. And I’m quite happy it turned out that way, because Anthony and Rose are the happiest couple I know.

They are now in their forties, Anthony and Rose. I’ve known them since I was a teenager, since they’re both childhood friends of my closest cousin. They have now been dating for maybe 15 years, and they have been separated three times. I clearly remember the first time it happened, it was back in 1998 when I had just got my drivers license. I remember I was ecstatic about that, and I rushed to the café where I used to hang about with my cousin and some of his friends.

Anthony and Rose were usually the disgustingly happy couple that always sat in the middle of the group, but that day something was off. Rose was sitting in another table and she looked like she had been crying; Anthony was nowhere to be seen. My instinct immediately warned me to tone down on my enthusiasm, and within a few minutes I learned the role-model couple that everyone in that circle of friends regarded as frame of reference…. was no longer a couple.

That first time, I think they were separated maybe for a whole week… and apparently they came back together on their own. They were just drawn together again quite naturally, and everyone was happy about that. We had grown so accustomed to watching those two love-birds together, that it really felt weird seeing them part their separate ways. By then, everyone of us believed Anthony and Rose would eventually get married. And they eventually did, but only after they endured certain other tribulations.

The second time they broke up I was out of town finishing my College education. I don’t know the exact details, except for what my cousin told me. Apparently, that time around they broke up because Anthony was messing around with other girls. And apparently, it was my cousin who talked sense into him. What he had with Rose was much more important and beautiful than some casual flings, so after about a month of being separated, Anthony did come back to his senses and he worked hard to re-ignite the relationship. Once again, everything was back to normal.

The third time this Barbie-and-Ken type of couple separated was just two years ago. This time around, it certainly looked they were done with each other for good. They were apart for nearly an entire year, and I’m happy to say this time around it was me who actively worked to get them back together. After spending my entire youth nurturing my ideals of a perfect romance after them (whom I perceived as an ideal couple), I simply couldn’t be still and see them live their miserable separate lives. That would just be wrong.

You may think it’s an overstatement, but they were both absolutely miserable during that whole year they were separated. Anthony got fat and sloppy like a pig, and Rose was starting to get too depressed to go out of her house at all. Fortunately, I was able to talk some sense into them, after several failed attempts. At first, they barely listened to me, but after a while I guess the message started sinking in: they were both fooling themselves assuming they were happy without each other. They weren’t happy and they weren’t fooling anyone else. They were just too stubborn to admit it.

It was just last year, in Anthony’s birthday party. A lot of talking and negotiation had already occurred by then, and I could feel I was making some real break-through. It was time for the final stroke, so I decided I would organize a surprise birthday party. Except the actual surprise was that Rose would be the only person in the party. Of course neither of them knew about it! Well, basically what we did was to close them together in the same room for almost 24 hours. We literally forced them to talk with each other… and you know what? It worked!

Almost a year after that, I’m happy to announce that Anthony and Rose are finally getting married. They were never the kind of people who believe in marriage – they were happy with the idea of just spending their lives together without having and official commitment; but the trials and tribulations they’ve been through changed their minds. They are now getting ready to tie the knot, and Rose just had their first son Alex. Within my close group of friends, we’re all terribly proud of this couple, especially since we all feel we had our part in making them stay together. And if there ever was a picture of happiness… it’s Anthony and Rose.

Sometimes, getting your life back does involve getting your EX back. But that’s something you need to know and feel deep inside. And you need to question whether you want that person back in your life because you’re lonely, or if you want her back because your live won’t be complete without that person. If you’re trying to deal with the pain of a break-up, you need to be honest to yourself before you realize which is the right course of action. Otherwise, you will do nothing but sabotage your own happiness and well-being.

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The previous post in this series demonstrated how some couples would be better of separated, as opposed to growing addicted to their mutually inflicted misery. This post will tell a story that’s just the opposite: of a guy who grew addicted to his loneliness, and a girl who could never quite get over their separation.

Dave and Deni are  both in their mid-thirties, now. It was about 10 years ago, when they lived what I believe was the happiest time of their lives. That’s the time when they were together, and even though they refuse to admit it, I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen either of them happier, ever since.

I never knew exactly what brought about their breaking up. No one ever did, and sometimes I wonder if even they have a clear notion of the specific reasons that pushed them apart. I just know they were the perfect couple, back then. Or at least as perfect as any couple could get.

They were both the creative types. Dave was studying fine arts, Deni had dropped out of college and she was doing alright as a writer. They met each other in the summer of 1999, and they got married in the first day of the next year. At the time every one of us (close friends on both their sides) thought they were crazy. But all the while, somehow it felt like the right thing…. as they were indeed meant to be together.

Those were some amazing times for all of use. We spent most of the new year’s eve together in a cottage in the woods, and needless to say it was a reckless party. We’re talking a bout the turn of the millennium, here!

When the dawn light shed on the first morning of 2000, Dave and Deni borrowed my car and rushed out to the nearest town. We thought they were just going to get a motel where they could be more comfortable. It turns out they went out to get a couple of wedding rings and a ceremony. To this day, I don’t have a clue how they did all that on a holiday. I just know that by the end of the first day of the new millennium, they were back to the cottage as a married couple.

Needless to say, we all thought they were crazy. But all the while we felt quite proud on their courage and impulsiveness, and we swooned over their movie-like romantic resolution. That evening we partied like it was 1999 no longer. It looked like a promising beggining for the milennium, and for all of us. But that’s just not how real life works, is it?

Around that time I was still attending college, and as such many of the details were lost on me, concerning the life of Dave and Deni as newlyweds. I do think they were quite happy for a couple of years, but I do know their marriage didn’t survive its third year. When I permanently came back to my home town in the summer of 2003, the shadow of divorce already loomed – kind of like a terrible storm was on the brew.

As far as I know, both of them decided they’d be better off separated – the divorce was thus of mutual accord. Apparently, they just wanted to go different places in life, and they didn’t work out as a couple. Or so they tried to make us believe. Life runs its course either way, and years have a funny way of unfolding quickly – even when sometimes days, even hours seem to last for ages.

In the past few years, I’ve only occasionally talked with Deni over the Internet; I’d say once a year on average. Our conversations always seem to revolve around the same pattern. She always frets over her new boyfriends (who are invariably insensitive jerks – including her one girlfriend, back in 2007 I think), she always says she’s had it with that crazy town she happens to be living at. She always says that one of these days she’s heading back home, and inevitably she asks me how Dave is doing – to which I always reply “Just fine, I guess”.  I always say she ought to catch up with Dave, and she always replied that “Someday she will”. I never really believe it.

On his end, Dave is none the better. Ever since he broke up with Deni, I think he had just about three brief relationships – none of them lasting longer than one maybe two months. His three year marriage is Deni still remains as his personal record. It took him about three years since he even could star thinking of other girls. He just buried himself in work, rarely going out of his house, and very sparsely grooming himself. Following his break-up with Deni, he just got into his crazy / bum / priest / artsy kind of thing, and he never quite was the same.

Dave and Deni are the perfect example of a couple who should obviously get back together. Everybody can see it, except for themselves. All of their friends keep pointing them to the evidence, that neither of them was quite able to move on after their relationship. But they’re just too stubborn, like that. I almost feel like divulging their actual names and contacts, so that you readers could just flood their e-mails saying “DAVE AND DENI: GET BACK TOGETHER”. But obviously I won’t do such a thing.

Still, I cannot help but thinking how they should indeed admit to their past mistakes (whatever they were), and just make an effort to re-connect with each other. I know for a fact they will do just that sooner or later, same as I know for a fact they are indeed meant to be together. It’s just a matter of letting time unfold and life run its course… but still, it gets a bit frustrating and hopeless, realizing that people out there are wasting their lives lookign for something they already found quite a few years ago: a perfect romantic match.

Sometimes, getting your EX back is just the right thing to do. And sometimes, you won’t realize it before someone points it out!

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Have you ever heard the saying “Misery loves Company?” For some people this is remarkably true; in fact, I know a couple who could easily inscribe this age-old adage in their front door. And it would perfectly describe their relationship.

I will refer to these people as Jack and Jill. Not because they would mind seeing their mutual misery exposed online, but simply as a matter of politeness. Jack and Jill have been together for as long as I know them – and they’re childhood friends of my parents’, I’m thirty years old… that will give you a good idea of how long they’ve been together. Practically forever. Definitely for much too long.

Don’t take me wrong, dear reader: I generally nurture a great respect for the sanctity of matrimony, and I deeply admire couples who successfully spend a lifetime together, and who build a mutually positive life project. But not Jack and Jill. I’ve never seem this couple build anything except for intrigue, reprieve and self-loathing.

The first time Jack and Jill broke up (that I remember), I think I was about 7 years old. I remember Jill came over to my parent’s house in a huge distress, crying and moaning as tough she had eaten a full-featured pin cushion for breakfast. Apparently, Jack had been hitting her (or so she said; I remember my parents pointing out that she wasn’t bruised at all). She had had it with that guy, she said. She spent the whole weekend in our place, telling stories about how she was miserable. About how she would leave Jack and how she would be better off.

Do you know what happened then? Sunday afternoon, Jack came knocking on our door. He said he was sorry. No flowers, no apparent expression of regret. Just a half-hearted apology. And it was more than enough! Jill’s face immediately lit up (as though nothing had happened) and she left without even looking back. “Thanks for taking care of my Jill, guys” Jack said over his should just as they left. “It was all a misunderstanding, and we should talk it over alone. I’ll see you guys later”. My parents just shrugged, as though they were already well accustomed to the drama.

I was still young back then, so I could barely wrap my mind around what had just happened. Luckily (not), it didn’t take long at all before I witnessed a similar scene.

It was my ninth birthday. All my family was gathered together. Jack was there too, but not Jill. Apparently she was feeling sick and she couldn’t come to the party (of course that was a lie). Everything was going ok, and just when I was about to open my presents Jack simply broke down and started crying for no apparent reason. I think it was a few years until I realized what had happened in that evening: quite simply, Jill was apparently having an affair. Sure enough, it was of no consequence.

Fast forward to my teenage years. As I grew older, so did Jack and Jill started growing more reliant on my own support (also because my parents were obviously growing weary of putting up with them). At this point, they starting sharing on their personal troubles – but only when either of them was not present. Basically they both took every single chance they could to vent on how much they both hated being with the other.

At this point, they constantly kept doing these inordinate theatrical dramas, as though they enjoyed drawing crowds to the exposition of their mutual hatred and personal misery. I’m pretty sure they did a major break-up at least once a year. I think I was about 17 years old when I finally gathered the wits, courage and perseverance to ask the fateful question:

“Wouldn’t you be better off separated? I mean, it’s like you’re addicted to being mad at one another. Don’t you feel miserable living that way?”

Oh, the horror. You should have seen the expression of utter contempt in their faces, as though I had just said something absolutely despicable and false (which I hadn’t). They both stormed out of my house while raising all kinds of hell and pointing how I was either a retarded kid or doing drugs (which I wasn’t). That afternoon, I learned a fundamental truth.

No one is allowed to question the validity of Jack and Jill’s relationship. No one except Jack or Jill, of course. Only when they happened to be separate, and only when they happen to be going trough one of their routine break-ups. In the remaining occasions they will act (poorly) as though they’re be happiest and better adjusted couple on earth. That’s despite of the fact they clearly make each other miserable. If you think that’s sad, I should tell you it only got worse over time.

I really don’t know how my parents were so patient in putting up with their theatrical break-ups. Having learned their lessons over time, they never questioned either Jack or Jill, and they simply tried to support them in the best ways they could. Although in recent years, I noticed their patience started growing thin, and they started evading Jack and Jill self-pitying ploys. Truly a wise decision, I might add.

It’s a good thing Jack and Jill never had kids. They would have grown up to be some notoriously miserable and messed up adults, probably worse than their parents. In my opinion, not having kids was the only good thing that came out of Jack and Jill’s 30+ year relationship. This may sound a bit harsh, but trust me… after all these years of watching their personal dramas, I do know what I’m saying.

Whenever I try to comfort a friend who happens to be suffering from a broken relationship, I tell them stories about Jack and Jill. I tell them all these stories, and all the while I do my best to point out that sometimes, getting your EX back is a one-way ticket to ongoing personal misery. This is why I think people should really think whether they will be better off getting their EX back, of if they would better focus on just moving on and getting their lives back.

Ok, that was the first (of three) stories on the “Get your LIFE back” series. It may sound depressing, but I never said I was going to tell you a fairytale, right? In fact, the whole point of this story is showing that sometimes you’ll be better off NOT getting your ex back. And most of the times you won’t be able to figure that out for yourself until someone confronts you about it.

Rest assured, I also know some uplifting stories about people who did the right thing in trying to get their EX back. Next week, I’ll tell one such story.

If you haven’t yet, make sure to subscribe to this blog and you’ll get new posts straight in your mailbox!

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If you’ve ever found yourself in a position where you suffered to see your boyfriend or girlfriend get out of your life, you surely have a good idea of what I’m talking about. If you are in such a position right now, maybe you’re reading this article looking for help. That a good thing, and you will get such help – but it may be in the form you expect. You see, in my opinion there are only two ways to escape your present suffering:

1) Deal with it. Accept you’re better off without that person; even though you may be suffering from romantic withdrawal, you should recognize your relationship wasn’t positive. If so, you need to focus on getting your life back.

2) Deal with it. If you can honestly say that your relationship was healthy and promising for both you and your partner, do something about it – but make sure you know what  you’re doing. Learn how to get your ex back.

3) Deal with it, but please do yourself a big favor and avoid making rash decisions and desperate moves. I’m well aware you’re suffering; but before you act, you need to stop and decide on the right course of action.

Ok, so to summarize our topics…. you really need to deal with it. First and foremost, you need to quit evading your pain; it’s there for a reason, and you can learn something from it. You can become a better person once you let your pain change you for the best. Just be honest with yourself, and don’t let yourself go sour on account of your suffering.

The most important thing you need to do right now is figuring out the most appropriate course of action – that’s before you deal with getting your life back. You should notice I’ve written get your LIFE back, not get your EX back. In some cases it will be the same thing, in other cases it will be just the opposite. That’s why you need to do some soul searching and really be honest to yourself before you even think about doing anything else.

You need to figure out if your life was better while you were in that relationship, or if you were just addicted to that person.

That’s right, people can get addicted to one another – just like a drug. And like a drug, the effects of such addiction can be terrible and devastating. Especially if one person moves on with their life and the other one doesn’t. This is why at this point you need to really stop and think hard in what you’re doing:

Are you suffering because you genuinely love your EX, or are you suffering just because you were addicted to being in a relationship?

It’s usually difficult to tell the difference between both scenarios. Within your aching personal point of view, emotions will easily blur your perceptions. You will be the one source of your own misery for years to come, unless you take action now. Be honest with yourself, and decide whether you need to get your ex back or if you just need to get your life back.

Talking about honesty, here’s something I really need to point out: I don’t know you, dear reader. I don’t know your EX. I have personally no idea if your relationship is worth fighting for. As such, I cannot possibly advise you in the right course of action. HOWEVER, there is something I can do that will hopefully clear your mind. In fact, this month this blog will be running a special feature specifically focused on that purpose.

During the rest of the month, I’ll be telling you three different stories related with the whole Get EX Back concept. All of these stories end differently, and all of them are based on real people I know. I will only change the names of these people to safegueard their privacy, but other than that I will tell their stories just as they happened.

And when I’m done, you’ll hopefully realize that Getting your EX back may be the best thing you can do. Or it may be the worst. Or it may just be a great way to fool yourself. Hopefully when I’m done telling these stories by the end of the month, you’ll have sufficient perspective to make an informed decision.

I need you to take this month for yourself, for searching your answers inside yourself. Please avoid making rash decisions; avoid texting desperate messages or sending long-winded outbursting e-mails. This month, I would like you to take some time to think about what you REALLY should be doing, before you go and do it.

Make sure to subscribe to this blog (if you haven’t already), and each week you’ll get an e-mail with the latest section of this 5-part “Get your LIFE back” special feature. I promise that when you finish reading the last you’ll know what will be the right course of action for YOU.

And you WILL get your life back, regardless of whether you get your EX back as well.

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Sure, many people out there still conform to the traditional new year’s resolutions. Some people decide they’ll be more responsible, others swear they’ll let go of bad habits or excessive body fat. That’s all good, and it’s definitely better than just running around in circles as headless chickens looking after irretrievable fulfillment over a single night. Regardless, those aren’t quite the most important resolutions one should adopt, in the advent of this new year.

My recommendation to 2010 is for you to get in touch with your heart. Listen to it, be faithful to yourself. Ask yourself: Am I happy with the way I’m headed in my life, in my relationships? Is there something I’m leaving behind? Is there someone I would rather be with? If I’m happy with my spouse, and I putting my very best into this relationship? Am I holding back for no apparent reason? Those are the kind of questions you should really pause to consider, in the last few days of the year.

There are many lessons I hold dear, which I’ve learned from the sequence of years I’ve lived through. But the most important lesson is being faithful to one’s heart. You might have not realized this by now, but humans are exceptional and unceasing liars. We lie all the time to each other, and we lie the most to ourselves. We refuse listening to our hearts, we suppress our feelings for the sake of reason. And more often than not, we end up regretting it.

We indulge relationships that don’t bring us fulfillment. We sacrifice a much needed sense of belonging and harmony for trifle compensations such as a sticking with a beautiful (albeit shallow and insipid) wife, or a wealthy (but unaffectionate and arrogant) husband. We make all the wrong decisions by pursuing all the best motives. And generally we do it because we refuse to listen to the soft insistent voice that tries to warn us from within our own chest.

I don’t mean to propose that we’re all wrong in all relationships. I don’t mean to propose that we’re all inveterate liars. I DO mean to propose that the more we stay in tune with our own hearts, the more we’re faithful to our innermost feelings, the happier we will be in the long run. Further, I mean to propose this is probably the best time of the year to resolve following this kind of resolution, and it’s probably the best kind of resolution one should follow – and also one of the most elusive.

If nothing else, make up your mind to sort out your feelings in 2010. Know yourself, get acquainted with your true desires and emotions, and be unwavering in their pursuit. Quite probably in a year from now you’ll feel more comfortable in your shoes than ever before!

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You may want to offer presents as usual… but when it comes to your spouse or lover, I suggest you throw in some special gifts for a good measure. Just remember, Christmas is all about giving – not getting. If you decide to try some of these gifts make sure you do it wholeheartedly, without expecting for something in return. By doing so, rest assured some Christmas magic will take place, and you’ll be happier than you ever imagined possible.

All of these ideas for – let’s call it – complimentary Christmas gifts are absolutely free. None of them involves spending extra money, but they all involve spending some extra time. If you do it right it’s going to count as quality time, and it will genuinely help strengthen your relationship. If you’re feeling creative, don’t just say you’ll be doing so and so: you should come up with some “personal service” coupons and give them to your other half as a proof you’re serious about doing this.

1) Offer to cook AND do the dishes for the remaining days of the year. Well, it’s only about a week until the end of the year, right? Even if you really hate cooking and doing the dishes… well, quite likely so does your spouse. Also, taking her to the restaurant doesn’t count. The idea behind this present is showing you’re willing to step up and roll your sleeves, as well as proving you know your way around the kitchen.

2) Give some coupons for extended massage sessions. Sure, you may reason that you and your lover frequently indulge in mutual massaging. Well, mutual is not what you should aim for with this gift. It’s all about pleasing her, and being willing to neglect your comfort for the sake of hers. Make sure each massage is thorough, and make it last at least one hour. Be professional, make sure you don’t get kinky until you’ve provided a good service.

3) Ask her about her plans for a perfect day/night out. Do you ever get in those typical affectionate arguments over the perfect plans for a day or night out? Yeah, except for Barbie and Ken there isn’t a couple who doesn’t routinely engage such discussions. Well, this gift calls for putting your preferences aside and just focusing on fulfilling your lover’s every whim and wish for a whole day or night of going out. And don’t just tag along … make sure you enjoy it, or at least pretend you do!

4) Spare a specific amount of service hours. Print out a bunch of coupons with a big bold “1 hour free service” title and add “valid for anything from running errands to babysitting your cousin’s niece”. Make it real. Tell her you want to make up for all the times you evaded doing a favor for her, or when you were otherwise just feeling too lazy. Also, be a man. Be prepared to honor your word, whenever she gives you one of those coupons back. No excuses!

5) All of the above… and beyond! Nothing says “I love you” like being able to suppress your own whims for the sake of hers. If you really want to impress her, do all of the suggestions I’ve mentioned. Put your heart into it! Take some time to design some colorful service coupons and put them in a fancy envelope. Come up with additional offers you know she’ll like. Make it look like you’ve really put some thought into it, and show how serious you are about giving her some non-materialistic gifts as sign of your affection.

As you’ve probably noticed, the reasoning behind these gifts involves offering your help/support/company with something you’d normally hate doing. But hey, it’s Christmas! Just do your best to keep a happy face while obliging, and remember those are all things you should be doing on a regular basis anyway – that’s if you want to keep your relationship healthy, of course!

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Too many among us have wasted their precious youths waiting for their prince or princess charming: a living carbon copy of all our intimate longings and desires. Well, do you know what? Sometimes it’s better to just let go of such aspirations and start living in reality. In other words, it’s better to stop living in a world of fantasy and choose romantic love for what it’s meant to be: a construction of affection and perseverance.

In itself, Love is an elusive concept – regardless it’s generally very much attainable in a relationship. Perfect Love on the other hand, is absolutely unrealistic and delusional. It’s an imaginary concept, a matter for sigh-ridden romances and heart-warming operas. From fiction to reality much gets lost in translation, and it’s really sad how we sometimes evade something that might blossom into love, while insistently looking for something that would somehow match our inordinate romantic expectations.

Think about it for a moment. What kind of romantic love seems strongest: one that is seemingly innate and fairy-tale like and never took effort or commitment at all, or one that bears the the right fruit of mutual seasoning, respect and tolerance? While in their teenage years, most people will likely choose the former. This is perhaps to blame on immaturity and unrealistic expectations. This perception as love is akin to something that’s ready-made, and calls for no effort at all. Just like picking up your favorite burger and gnawing at it with the ease and delight of unabashed affection.

Well, know what? That’s really no love at all. It’s just gluttony, it’s craving for something that brings immediate albeit shallow satisfaction. And as you might have noticed…. in the realm of satisfaction, “rapid” invariably associates with “fleeting”.

I don’t believe in love at first sight. I do believe in intense chemistry at first sight. Love is a much more complex beast; is something that calls for understanding, mutual knowledge and insight of another soul. Love isn’t something that fulfills our every whim, it’s something that makes us whole. Something that we need, which sometimes is rather opposed to something that we want.

It may seem like an overstatement, but Love is  something that can be glimpsed in many – or maybe all – of our romantic interests, but all the while it’s something that may call for a lifetime of work and commitment before it can be fully observed. Despite the fact that you keep looking, you might have already met your prince or princess charming… several times over, and you probably failed to realize so each time, because you were too busy comparing your expectations to the actual person you were involved with.

Remember this: real love isn’t butterflies and fireworks sparking between two sights: it’s an ugly thing, akin to dreaming about your own entrails getting slowly scattered in the cold moonlight and being intensely afraid that our personal integrity may shatter and dissolve. Being in love can be intensely frightening, because it’s indeed meant to shatter our individual integrity, as to make room for fusion with another human being.

“Forever after” is a lot of time in real world romance, and quite often it’s terrifying to think a romantic affair might last longer. I think we all have a tendency to sabotate our relationships because we’re afraid it might otherwise last forever after. And that would be terrible, because our shot at true love might be just around the corner, right?

Think again, your best shot at true love might just be standing next to you, it might be the girl you’re already dating and thinking about letting go in your search for the One. True love might be standing right next to you, hoping that you’ll just grow up and embrace it.

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